


Best Friends On A (Time) Road Trip

by Darka3363



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: A series of drabbles, Accidental Time Travel, Annoying The Shit™ Out Of Vergil, Dante and Lady are BFF, Dante and the Red Hawaiian Shirt, Gen, Lady and Dante are mad scientists that use Dante's kitchen as their laboratory, Swearing, Time Travel, Vacation Time, they both are assholes and they like it that way
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:47:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23516410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darka3363/pseuds/Darka3363
Summary: Dante and Lady, like every other Thursday, were experimenting in Dante's kitchen, and accidentally time travelled back before Temen-Ni-Gru happened.They decided they are not dealing with this shit, and went on vacation.Chaos ensues.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 23





	1. #1

**Author's Note:**

> A series of drabbles that are purely dialogue.

“So let me get this thing straight. We are in the past.”

“Yes.”

“We are here because we got drunk and were experimenting with artifacts again in my kitchen.”

“Yes.”

“And now we are like a month before your father and my brother raised Temen-Ni-Gru.”

“That is correct.”

“I don’t wanna deal with my dear older brother, and I’m pretty sure you don’t wanna meet your asshole daddy too, so what about stealing all money from Arkham and go on a vacation? It’s been a while since we were on one.”

“And this is why we are the best friends.”


	2. #2

"So, what are we gonna do with your amulet?"

"What do you mean?"

"It is a part of the Perfect Amulet that is _required_ to unseal the power Vergil wants right?"

"Oh, right. Well, I was thinking of telling them that I lost it during a drink game to some fucker."

"And where the amulet actually will be?"

"On me, of course, just under a bazillion of different seals."

"You are one clever bastard, y'know? Hey, let's make a fake amulet so you can _actually_ loose it in a drink game."

"Lady, I love you."

"I know, Dante, I know."


	3. #3

"Dante… Is this a red Hawaiian shirt?"

"Indeed it is! I won this, and a huge beach umbrella. And don't worry, I lost the amulet too and before you ask, yes I am _sure_ it was the fake one and not the real deal, thanks for believing in me, I appreciate it."

"Dante, I always believe in you, I just don't always trust you with important things."

"Oh, because it makes it _so much better_."

"But it is."

"Sometimes you're a real bitch, y'know?"

"But you like it."

"Whatever, let's go steal our vacation money."

"Now we're talking. Let's go."


	4. #4

"Eleven, twelve, thirteen…"

"You sure like to count your cash, but gotta admit, stealing those was easier than I thought it would be."

"...Did your kleptomaniac tendencies kicked in again?"

"...Why?"

"Because I'm pretty sure you didn't had those books before, and the watch you have on your wrist looks nothing like you can afford, period."

"...I've stolen a watch?"

"Only you, Dante."

"Hey, it's just one measly watch."

"And five books."

"And five books. And maybe a necklace."

"..."

"And maybe I raided Arkham's closet and stole his clothes. And maybe they are now burning at the backyard."

"Goddamnit, Dante!"


	5. #5

"It's a very good thing that you won that umbrella, because I remember _vividly_ your last attempt at tanning, and it didn't look well."

"Hey, it was an accident, alright? I just happened to sleep on the sun before mission. I think that's why I sweared off sun naps too, and you did too."

"I tan red, it would look horrible with the clothes I'm wearing. You at least would look good if the tan didn't clash with your hair so horribly, horribly bad. Now get out the lounge chairs, I wanna finally dig into the martini and ice creams."


End file.
